Canada Day

 

Many things have happened in the week since my last post, so I am breaking this one up to help me organize my thoughts.

Side Effect Report

Treatment went well last week, and my side effects are consistent with what I have experienced with previous chemo treatment. If anything, I was a little bit less tired on the weekend than I have been previously, perhaps thanks to the extra recovery week. My sense of taste is the worst it has ever been, though, so that has been really annoying. Textures and flavours are all not quite right, and I have had to give myself little pep talks in order to eat properly this week. My finger numbness feels about the same. My feet feel more numb than last time, but better when I move more. It feels like my brain fog has been worse this time around, but it is difficult to know for sure as this has not been a normal week. We have been busy, and that makes it feel like I can't keep up.

Grade 8 Graduation

Our family has officially graduated from Codrington School after 12 years! Lucy missed out on an in-person celebration two years ago, but things were a little more normal for Miriam. There was an outdoor barbecue at the school on Friday that we all attended, and it was wonderful to see so many staff members in person after the last two years. The formal graduation ceremony was Monday night. I had decided weeks ago that I would not attend, and with the ceremony just 4 days post-chemo treatment I was pretty sure I would be feeling pretty awful that day. My parents and Rick's parents all came to attend the graduation. It was really nice for all of us to be together as it had been years since our parents have seen each other. I helped Miriam with her hair and makeup and she wore the shoes that I wore for my sister's wedding years ago. This is why we keep shoes, right? By all accounts the ceremony was great, and some brave parents in the neighbourhood hosted a party for the students afterwards. As crappy as I was feeling, it was nice to have something positive to distract me from myself.

Gatherings

This week I also had the opportunity to see some of my colleagues from my current school (Maple Ridge) as well as my previous school (Eastview). It was great to see my long-time Eastview Science colleagues and to be able to wish an old friend a happy retirement in person. The fact that my illness coincided with a school switch has been strange for me. I was at Eastview for about 17 years. My colleagues there are also my friends and we have been through many things together over the years. I continue to feel their love and support now, and they will always be part of my work 'family.' I was only at the Maple Ridge gathering for a short time, so didn't get to see too many people, but it was nice to see some of our new staff mark the end of our first year together. I have continued to feel connected to the school and staff, but missing out on almost half of the school's first year has been difficult. Community building takes time, and being on the outside of things is not my favourite thing. ;)

Paperwork

One of the jobs that comes with illness is paperwork. Since I know that I will be in treatment until sometime this fall, I know it is unlikely that I will be returning to work in 2022. The paperwork involved in documenting an illness for insurance companies is fairly involved. I had many pages of forms to fill out as did my doctor, and the doctor also needed to provide supporting documentation. I can afford the cost of having these forms filled out by the doctor, but wondered about people who might find that the cost is a barrier. It is also true that cancer is a 'good' diagnosis in terms of being off work. A diagnosis like mine is familiar and fits a known profile. People with physical or mental health problems that don't fit as neatly into a box can struggle to have their claims understood and approved. As part of my medical documentation, all of the clinic notes and diagnostic results were included. I skimmed through most of the notes, curious about some things. For instance, I had never asked or been told the official 'stage' of my cancer, content to know where it was in my body and what needed to be done. For those who have asked, I know know that the official staging designation is 3A, which means the cancer 'locally advanced.' Again, I already knew that (since I know it was found in my lymph nodes) but didn't know the official name of my stage. I loved the positive and personal nature of many of the clinic notes, and have included a few short excerpts here...each is from a different doctor on a different day:

And, my favourite line from my CT scan report:

Cottage Again

We are at the cottage again. After the graduation celebration Monday I went into cottage planning mode. Every time we come up for longer than a weekend there is always careful preparation, particularly around food shopping and packing. Packing and planning also often creates some stress. This time around, finding myself in a serious brain fog, making a grocery list felt like a near impossible task. Rick and I did the shopping together and the girls were a big help with food prep; we really like to marinate and freeze things like chicken to make the cooking easier at the cottage. Wednesday night and yesterday morning we ran a few final errands and by 7PM last night we had arrived, unpacked, eaten dinner, and were enjoying a quiet evening. Planning, packing, and traveling has me feeling exhausted, so today is going to be a very quiet Canada Day for me.