So, it's official...I've got cancer. I wasn't surprised to hear those words. Sometimes you just have a feeling. We are still waiting for some results from pathology that will provide us with more details about the type of cancer. This information will be important for deciding on the sequence of treatment. The initial report shows that I have cancer in my breast and also in the axillary lymph node they biopsied. Based on our conversation with the doctor today, we are fairly certain that both chemotherapy and surgery will be required. On Monday I have an appointment with a surgeon and hopefully by then we will have most/all of the information we need to figure out what happens next. A good piece of news is that my bone scan was clear! I was very happy to hear this, because when you think you might have cancer you have the tendency to over-analyze little aches and pains. I'm glad my hips only ache because of 'old age.' ;) I am in very good hands. We are so thank...
Since people who read this blog include those who love me BUT may not want to read about things I might write about sex and vaginas, consider this your fair warning. No judgement. I can totally dig not wanting to hear about these things from your sister, for example. ;) I have been taking my 'menopause meds' for about 2 months now. As I was already in a chemo-induced menopause (ovaries have been asleep since the spring) I wasn't really sure what kind of symptoms or changes I might expect. When discussing this medication my oncologist (who is wonderful) gave a very quick rundown of major symptoms (hot flashes, fatigue, sleep troubles, joint pain...) and I replied 'Yeah, menopause symptoms' and he said 'yup.' And that was that. My perception of menopause has been that it is a time where hormones change, periods stop, hot flashes and sleep problems happen, and people have mood swings. Hot flashes and mood swings related to this 'change of life' are jok...
I don't have a particular date that I can call my 'cancerversary.' I know that about a year ago I was pretty sure I had cancer and had started taking steps to find out. March 10th was the day I was assessed by a caring and compassionate oncologist who, though she could not definitively confirm that I had cancer, told me that it was very likely. It was not until around March 25 that I finally heard the words, but hearing the words really just confirmed what I already knew. So now, with the 'big three' cancer treatments done (chemo, surgery, radiation) and some preventative immunotherapy and hormone therapy underway I am trying to figure out how to define myself. I am no longer calling myself a 'cancer patient' although I still hang out in the chemo suite from time to time. Maintaining this connection to the Cancer Centre makes it difficult to NOT feel like a cancer patient and also offers an ongoing connection to my caregivers so that I don't feel abandon...
Comments